Reaching a real guru and the code of conduct
Read the previous part here- The Guru- 1
May 22, 2024
Reaching a real guru
Sanatana shastras have said that one must have enough spiritual merits to reach a real guru. Those spiritual merits are gained over multiple lifetimes through the auspicious deeds of seva (service), sadhana and meditation. There is no doubt that a true spiritual seeker definitely reaches a true guru no matter how many fraudsters try to distract and deviate her/him from the path of dharma. On the other hand, a person seeking short-cut, a quick-remedy for whatever is troubling will most likely find the self stuck with a fake guru which eventually will cause disappointment to that person.
To reach a real guru and also recognize her/him is a great accomplishment indeed. Many people ignored Maa Sharada, the Holy Mother at Dakshineshwari Kali, not recognizing the Divinity that radiated from Her! Poor are the souls who can’t recognize the Divine in a human body because of their own ignorance and weird is the society that worships such great saints after they have gone! Well, that is the story of most of the saints anyway. Hence, one must never give up sadhana, meditation and seva (service) even when one hasn’t reached one’s real guru yet! Having faith in Nature, one must always keep up the good karma tasks to cleanse and purify one’s own self continuously. And when one finally reaches the guru to whom one’s heart simply melts, the magical door to the Divine opens up provided the disciple too walks on the path with sincerity.
Code of conduct with a guru
What’s the point of accepting one as a guru when one doesn’t have any faith in one’s own guru? So, its better for a seeker to seriously consider this most crucial step wherein one accepts one as a guru. It is better to see and check things up before taking up discipleship and when one has received deeksha, one must strive to be a good disciple. A person when accepts someone as a Guru, should sincerely follow the Guru’s instructions and not hop from one guru to the other making a mess out of one’s own spiritual journey.
Deeksha or initiation is a process by which a guru accepts a disciple. Since the past karma (previous lifetime or past of the present birth) has a huge impact on a disciple’s life and may bring up roadblocks and suffering to one’s own present life. The guru eases up the process for the disciple by taking up the bad karma of the disciple and showering a bit of her/his own good grace upon the disciple. This is totally a compassionate process and it brings in suffering for the guru due to imbibing the negative karma of the disciple. Nonetheless, the guru is at a higher stature than a disciple in terms of spirituality, hence, the guru may suffer about 10% of the total suffering that has been transferred.
Since gurus are compassionate and offer Deeksha to many people, sometimes they get many serious ailments! Sri Ramakrishna was afflicted with cancer due to giving out Deeksha and taking on immense negative karmas!
Now, the question arises that when a guru is compassionate, should a disciple be then callous? In reality, just passing the negative karma on to the guru and receiving deeksha isn’t enough. Initiation only clears up the path but not the tendencies of a person. An initiation by a guru goes waste if a person refuses to improve her/his own tendencies, mind and habits. A clear path is not enough for a vehicle to go smoothly, it has to be driven by a person wherein the driver takes care of fuel, machines, driving tactic on the road. Hence, merely receiving and initiation and not putting efforts on self-improvement won’t let anyone anywhere.
A guru initiates a person on basis of faith. If a person doesn’t have enough faith on the guru, its better to not get initiated else, one may incur the negative karma through guru ninda.
In Sanatana Dharma, guru ninda is one if the biggest roadblocks in one’s spiritual path. It means disrespecting the guru. Guru’s disrespect happens when one does not listen to the guru’s instructions despite repeating many times, doesn’t speak to the guru mindfully or when that seeker has distrust in the guru despite initiation.
So, its better to seek initiation only if one has faith. Guru ninda is a tremendously negative act by which one earns negative karma so, one must listen to the words and instruction of the guru with utmost seriousness and speak with the guru very respectfully or simply drop the initiation and leave the guru.
In case guru ninda happens, the guru may forgive the disciple out of ever compassionate grace. But sometimes, the Nature or the higher power will not and that is where things mess up. The nature always supports and protects the serious seekers who put in efforts and those people who have already received Divine grace or ultimate spiritual destination, are loved the most by the Divine, like the genuine guru who is out in the world due to compassion, serving the society to light up their own spiritual paths!
Listening to instructions, sharing problems, understanding the issues should not become an escape route where one comes up with myriad reasons, or say, excuses, to never carry out tasks as told by the guru which will help the spiritual seeker! Active effort in the correct direction as shown by guru is a sign of a sincere disciple.
Speaking with friends is a nice experience where we let our hearts out in whatever language we choose but speaking with an enlightened guru or any realized soul is a completely different ball game! Such souls have the power to materialize what we say. Guru can be friendly but to treat the guru just like a regular friend isn’t recommended. A person must measure her/his words before speaking out to the guru. In case of any mistake, one must immediately apologize. Words carry immense potential especially when spoken to a guru. Even a joke must never be too harsh or unruly.
Disagreements may happen with a guru too but instead of attacking personally, one must be respectfully state what one feels. For example, if I don’t agree with a point that Maa makes, I will prefer to say, “Maa, I am unable to accept this point. Maa, is there any alternative? Or maybe please explain it once more in a bit more detail in case I am misunderstanding it.” I will not say, “You are wrong. Its not correct,” as it sounds commanding and disrespectful.
Listening to the guru’s words, carrying out the instructions to the best of one’s own capacity and speaking respectfully is a mark of respect to the guru. A genuine and sincere disciple always reminds one’s own self that the person she/he is talking to is the guru who has the right to correct us when required, break our ego when needed and despite anything, harsh words should never come out from the mouth causing guru ninda.
Maa, may I be always yours
Ever gazing at your feet
Never should my eyes behold
The days of disrespect by my deeds;
And let my actions always be
Of utmost love and respect, Maa!
May I never fall from grace
Through Guru-ninda!
Maa, may I be a good disciple
Upholding Truth, Honesty, Love
So that my ignorance dispels
Like the Holy Light from above!
My humble praanam to my Guru!
